What a beautiful day! Well, inside my head and heart, not outside so much. It's rained, hailed, potential for tornadic action, and a likelihood of snow sometime today. Go home Mother Nature, you're drunk. Seriously.
No, what's beautiful is how seemingly small changes in life - and some great big changes - are shaping and molding my future.
Today, I had a breakthrough, and I have to thank my pal Angie for it. Let me explain...
I'm a low maintenance girl. I don't spend much time on the latest and greatest baubles, creams and potions. I am who I am and that's all that I am (I'm Popeye the Sailor Man, Toot - Toot! - wait, no.). I have never spent much time thinking about what the difference between self care and pampering was. Do you know the difference? Is there one? Are people who "pamper themselves" wrong, spoiled or entitled? What IS pampering? Do you have to deserve to be pampered? Is there a way to earn it?
I have more projects going than I can keep up with daily, and let's face it, self care has often fallen by the wayside. Why? Because I didn't have time, didn't feel I deserved it, hadn't earned it, couldn't afford it. But, by not taking care of myself (my WHOLE self) I was adding to stress, aggravation, feelings of inadequacy, and burying my joy. Which meant that I wouldn't earn it, would never have time, and would continue on with the I'm not important enough for self care mindset. It's a vicious cycle!
All these things have swirled in my mind, and I became judgy. (Me? No!) I felt like those people - the "Pampered" people - didn't really deserve it. That money or fame or a bad sex video leaking to the world was why they got to have the good life of spas, high end product lines named after them, blow outs and buffed fingers, glowing skin and to be envied by all the world. Turns out, I was wrong. (Mark it, and someone tell the hubster I said it.)
In my opinion, pampering is the name for self care given by those who have yet to find the value in it.
Wait - how has someone not found the value in self care? Before we can answer that, what is self care?
Jen's definition of self care:
Actions that empower you and enhance the quality of your sense of health, fitness, emotional wellness, and overall being. Actions that help you feel amazing and allow you to help others feel amazing.
So, things like showering, eating right, reading a great book, going for a walk, hugging, and learning how to use power tools all qualify. Other self care items: working out, massage, talking to a counselor or great friend, being part of a book club, volunteering. Others? Facials, pedicures, chiropractic care, learning to and practicing cooking and taking time to buy clothes that when you're wearing them make you feel amazing.
Think about this: all these things can be viewed as rewards. Things you have to earn. But, we don't think twice about rewarding ourselves with things that potentially negatively impact our sense of wellness (health). Great job on that project - eat some sugar laden treats. Hard day at work? Drink some alcohol. Need time off? Plop down in front of the TV for hours on end. Do any of those things improve who you are or how you feel?
And here's what hit me... You don't have to EARN the right to be happy and healthy. You shouldn't have to wait to use the good china. Go ahead and use the fancy soaps. Get out the good towels. I work hard, do my best to take care of my family, friends and coworkers. I am, every day, deserving of self love and self care.
Today - I enjoyed a wonderful facial. 60 minutes of Oh.Emm.Gee amazing from Angie Ruh at Shine.
Not only does it feel amaze-balls (thanks Ruh!) - but I actually relaxed. I let go. It was a form of meditation, I suppose. I didn't allow myself to think of work stuff, or how much I had to do today, or how sleepy I was after my early workouts. I just took deep breaths and enjoyed the smell of the lotions, the feeling of the warm blankets wrapped around me, the soft and soothing music in the background.
I emerged a soft skinned, relaxed and happy me. My synapses were firing with ideas and excitement for my new ventures, I was excited to spend the afternoon with the hubster (a day date which is also part of our relationship self care), and found myself feeling lucky to have such wonderful, interesting, caring and enterprising people in my life. I was energized. De-stressed. Happy.
Here's what makes the difference between pampering and self care. I am ready to share that feeling with others. My cup is full and I'm ready to pour!
What it comes down to is that I don't need a special occasion to look and feel beautiful. I don't have to earn the right to take care of me and fill my own cup. I don't have to wait for a birthday or promotion. Every day is the right day to feel great about yourself.
Find things that make you feel amazing!
I want to hear some of your self care / self love activities (keep it PG, folks - I hear the 12 year olds in you snickering...), so leave them in the comments!
So many wonderful things happening - and this realization is one of them! Happy Pampering (wink wink) and congratulations on taking care of YOU!!
Until next time,
<3 Jen
