I AM ... DETERMINED

Hey friends!


It's hard to believe this year already. I saw a meme today that pretty much sums it up:

I'm 100% over this year. With all that's going on in the world - pandemic, politics, rude people, toilet paper hoarders, and spring breakers... I'm just over it. As important as I know all these steps are to "flatten the curve" - I'd be lying if I told you I wasn't VERY worried about the future - in general, but mine specifically! Good thing I AM... DETERMINED!

I'm determined not to let this new situation bring me down. Sometimes, easier said than done.

I had a rough one last week - tried to find inspiration and the podcast I chose had the host talking to his mom about growing up. I ugly cried. I miss my mom and would do anything to be able to have that kind of chat with her right now. His message was positive, but I was overcome with grief and didn't process it well. 

We got the news that parent's weekend was cancelled for my youngest who is at OSUT (basic training). I miss him and know that he's fine (he was able to call home and check in), but that added to my feeling of disconnection.

I bet you knew this about me - but I'm definitely an extrovert! I need my people time to 'charge my batteries'. But in order to do my part, it's me, the pups and the hubster. That's it. While I love my boys - sometimes you need some other people around. (Now y'all know why I have whole conversations with my dogs! I'm not crazy, I just need to get out more!) I'm always down for a chat, conference, or hike (while staying 6 feet apart) - if you're looking for some recharge time like I am.

So, to keep myself busy and DETERMINED:

💗I've just learned that TODAY Patrol Notes is live on Amazon! I'm so excited!! It took some patience and determination to get it done, dealing with an online publisher has it's own set of challenges. But when you put in the work, things get done! Get a copy, leave a review, and let's meet up so I can autograph your book. ;)

💙I've moved on to the next edition (Patrol Notes 1) - I know, it's out of order. I did that on purpose. I'm starting on the art for it this week. I'm not an artist, but I'm DETERMINED to let this book come from me (maybe with some more help from my sister).

💚Also, I'm still working toward a couple of events that haven't (yet) been cancelled or postponed - I'm hopeful that by late summer we'll be back to hitting up our favorite events, responsibly, and taking care of all the small businesses that need us!

💜I was gifted a fantastic new hobby - a Ukulele! (Yes, I'm a very lucky girl with the best peeps!)  I'm excited to start learning how to play and jammin' out some songs by the fire pit this summer. I'm DETERMINED to let this be the first instrument I can play! I always wanted to play, but growing up that was never in the budget. I sang instead. That was free.

💛Because I know how I get when I'm down, I've been making time to exercise and yesterday made arrangements to borrow a stationary bike from the gym where I teach. I did a 45 minute master class this morning and holy geez, I need to do that every day! What a fantastic way to start the day. Now, I need to find a spot to put my TRX suspension trainer up! I bought it for travel, but seems like having it at home is where I need it most! With no good doors to use at home (multi-level house without much room in front of the doors), I may need to install something outside on or around the deck. I'll share when I get it figured out.

💕The hubster and I have a few projects on the list to work on in the shop, and now that the weather is getting a little nicer, I'll get to spend some time in there creating, wrecking, and rebuilding. Replacing our 6-foot privacy fence is giving us lots of reclaimed wood to fuel our imagination! (That fence is another project we need some nice weather to tackle.)

How are you keeping busy and staying determined while practicing responsible social distancing? I'd love to hear any of your tips and tricks, activities, favorite shows and movies to binge, or healthy recipes you're making! I hope to have one or two to share with you SOON!

Until then,

Ciao for now!
<3  jen

I AM ... WORRIED but HOPEFUL

Hey gang - I'm glad I caught you. Between hand washing and disinfecting your doorknobs and light switches, and checking your email and social media to see what ELSE is cancelled as a result of the COVID-19 virus, I hope you are finding time to take care of yourself.

So, I am ... worried. Not just about being sick, but about the overall impact this will have on my home, community, friends and family all over the US. I mean, I'm pretty lucky... I'm overall very healthy, work from home, and a 6-pack of MEGA roll toilet paper in my linen closet.

The way this will impact us is hard to fully realize and may look different for each of us. My daughter works in the hospitality industry, and no one is going out for dinner. Many of my friends work in event production (including me!) and events are being cancelled left and right. (I just learned that the College World Series is cancelled and Disney World is closing!) One of my sisters works in a hospital, and she'll have to be there and thus be exposed to sick people. My son is in OSUT (basic training) in Georgia and I've got no way to check in with him besides sending letters.

Most of the folks I know do not have the option to work from home and have limited vacation and sick leave. Another group of friends are small business owners. How do you keep the lights on when everyone is staying home and there's no one in your shop, no revenue, but bills still come due?

I am trying to take my own advice and find the silver lining in this situation... but I'm struggling.

• More time at home is good. More reading, writing, and tackling some building projects in the shop. 

• People learning the importance of washing their hands is also a good thing (how was that not a thing before?), and folks looking out for one another is encouraging. 

But, to be honest, that's all I got. 

I'm anti-panic, but common sense isn't as common as one would hope. Sometimes it's not a disregard for common sense, but a lack of options. Let's say I'm sick, but I don't have any paid leave, so I take all the OTC drugs and go and struggle through my shift at work. I know I should stay home, but can't afford to lose 8 hours of pay. While I personally don't worry about this scenario, I know lots of folks who do. How about those folks who were raised like me - no blood, no bones sticking out, no ER or office visit. They continue to push through when they really need to be tested. But, co-pays and prescriptions and missing work just aren't options. Not to mention there wouldn't be a test available for them anyway (that's a completely separate rant that's a little heavy on my political opinions).



So, what do we do?

Take a break and breathe. Look out for your loved ones, pitch in to help where you can. WASH YOUR HANDS. Be mindful of covering coughs and sneezes. Disinfect those surfaces you touch most (doorknobs, light switches, refrigerator door, car doors and steering wheel) regularly. Utilize email, conference calls, and video conferencing when possible. Read more. Don't panic. Don't believe everything you see online - do some research. Check in with the CDC and WHO. Be a good human. Hording products like toilet paper is ridiculous and selfish. Make sure you have 2 weeks of medicine (if you take meds regularly). Oh, and did I mention... WASH YOUR HANDS (sing the alphabet song - 20 seconds)! Take care of yourself physically (go for a walk!), emotionally, and spiritually (whatever that looks like for you). None of those things are exclusive to a building, event, or being part of a large group of folks.

It's a scary time, none of us knows what's going to happen. But worry and panic won't make anything turn out better. Remember that the organizations closing and canceling things are really trying to do what's best for us all. It's up to us to find patience and understanding and to work through this challenge with love and grace for our fellow humans. I'm hopeful that we'll all work together and look at what's best for everyone.

Let's all just be decent human beings. Is that too much to ask?

Until next time,

Ciao for now!

<3Jen

I AM ... PUBLISHED

Hey friends,

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood - not just because it's almost 60 degrees and sunny outside (which makes be VERY happy... especially since this week last year I was scooping on to snow piles that were almost five feet high!), but also because I can cross one of my BIG FIVE off the 2020 list...

Patrol Notes has been submitted for Publishing! 

The Ebook is up for presale/preorders and will be released on Friday March 13th. The Paperback is still in the "review" stage of publishing and I'll share just as soon as it's available!

So, this book isn't that big of a deal, really. It's a collection of things I've written over a long time, an idea that I had and some derpy drawings that I scratched out. But it feels like a big deal. Let me tell you about why...

I've come to realize as an adult that my coping mechanism throughout life has been procrastination and quitting.

If you don't finish, you can't fail. 

I was (let's be honest - AM) terrified of being judged and found wanting. I'm a people pleaser to the core and the thought that someone won't enjoy what I write, will think the drawings are terrible, will say that anyone could have done it, and wonder "what took you so long, it's not like it was hard" paralyzed me for years.

I recognize (in hindsight) that I could have done this book years ago. I had the material. I had the means. I had the time. But what I didn't have was the confidence or the "zero fucks" attitude. 

Why, for the love of Pete, do I shrink back from hard things, or big projects, or procrastinate on my dreams and goals? 

Because I can't be judged a failure if I don't start. 

At least not by other people - I have absolutely judged myself a failure for not starting So. Many. Things.

So this is me telling you - BE FUCKING BRAVE. Do it despite the judgement you fear. Do it because failing isn't the worst thing. Regret is. 

I don't want to look back and wonder why I didn't do the things that I KNEW I was capable of, but was too paralyzed by fear of judgement to actually do. Especially not things that are simple, and bring joy, and are so subjected that someone somewhere is bound to say "I don't get it" or "I didn't like it." But damn it - someone might say, "that was funny" or "your dogs are adorable" or "thank you for putting this out in the world, I think I'm going to write a book, too."

There are so many other things I want to do and be and try and fail at - the list is long. And I just might be to a place when I'm ready (and kind of looking forward) to fail. Even failing feels like an accomplishment now.  

So, here's to trying some new stuff, and SUCKING at it. Still counts. No regrets, just lessons.

Watch for more information about the book (and editions to come)... I'll be sure to update the blog and my social media pages.

Until then...

Ciao for now!

<3 Jen